Putting a loved one in a nursing home is a difficult decision regardless of the circumstances. In the case of Alzheimer’s, most research shows that at some point in the progression of the disease a nursing home becomes the right decision for the family in Watchung. According to the US Department of Health and Human Services, there are nearly 2 million people currently living in some form of nursing home. Over 90% of these residents are over 65 years old and most require 24 hour supervision due to some physical limitation or dementia.
Alzheimer's Care - Choosing a Memory Care Facility For Your Loved One
Alzheimer’s disease is an extremely sad and difficult condition to work with. This disease is very difficult on the family members in Watchung. Just thinking that as the days slip by your aging loved one will soon become more and more distant. This can be very depressing and an emotional time for most family caregivers. Besides the common emotion of depression, most family members often feel angry, frustrated, and even at a loss for words.
Community Resources for Older Adult Services
I thought we had a contract, reverse parenting so to speak. I look after you and you look after me when the time comes for reciprocation. For some of you I'm sure it would be considered a selfish expectation of my children. I don't think so; because it is a contract we formed when each of them was born. Their precious little lives belonged to me; their fate in my hands until they reached adulthood and could fend for themselves.
When I held them in my arms, our silent contract and bond was forged. We became dependent on one another, in my mind our lives would be forever intertwined. I looked after them at the most vulnerable parts of their lives and at some point I trusted they would do the same for me, their protector, their confidante, loving friend and mother. I thought we had a contract.
My children were my life. I took care of them and answered their every need. How could I deny them? Being a parent can be a thankless job. When they were hurt, I was there to render my love, attention and an occasional trip to the hospital. My dedication to them for their well-being never wavered. I thought we had a contract.
I take care of you my children until you can discern the world for yourselves and when I begin to age and my mortality becomes something that can no longer be ignored, my hope has been and is that you will honor our contract initiated at your birth.
The silent pact I made with my children has now been consummated. I find myself dependent on them, trusting their judgment and compassion as they did with me. They are now in control of my life, where I live, what I wear and even my finances. My mental state, despite my stroke was left intact without any effects on my speech, but only my will to walk, to be back in control of my life. My will to be me still prevails despite the living arrangements and choices my children have made for me.
I have to believe that I exist occasionally in thought as proven by the infrequent visits of my family and friends. There are many days that loneliness becomes a burden. I feel that I am slowly becoming only a memory not only to my family, but also to those who mattered to me most before my sequestration in this place. So, I wait. The time spent disconnected and suspended by emptiness gives one ample time to ponder life as it is and what it was.
I suppose the easy thing to do would be to give up, succumb to this dreadful existence. My children come see me when they can. I can no longer choose how frequently I see them, my family members or friends. I no longer have that choice.
The fact still remains, I want to go home. For living here for me is not living. I wish to discuss the terms of this contract, but as each day passes it does not appear a negotiation is possible. My children seem oblivious to my plight.
They are comfortable with the obligatory visitations on those special days of the year when family is supposed to draw near. So, I wait and fill my empty moments with memories as a little of myself is given up to the scheduled daily tasks of the staff. I am slowly coming to terms with my situation because it's binding and for me, one sided. I thought we had a contract...
How to Find the Best Live in Personal Care Agencies in Watchung,Somerset County?
Putting a loved one in a nursing home is a difficult decision regardless of the circumstances. In the case of Alzheimer's, most research shows that at some point in the progression of the disease a nursing home becomes the right decision for the family. According to the US Department of Health and Human Services, there are nearly 2 million people currently living in some form of nursing home. Over 90% of these residents are over 65 years old and most require 24 hour supervision due to some physical limitation or dementia. However, due to the increase in "familial Alzheimer's", aka Early On-Set Alzheimer's, there are many people in their 40's and 50's that are now requiring long term care.
A memory care facility is a specialized nursing home that provides - in addition to a room and food - full time medical (nursing) care and in-house rehabilitative services, along with close supervision to provide some measure of physical protection for the residents. The home will not be designed as an acute care facility, but the goal at an Alzheimer's care facility should be to help people maintain, as much as possible, their daily independent functioning.
It is obvious that when choosing a care facility or nursing home it is first necessary to consider the needs of the individual for whom you are providing Alzheimer's care. You must determine what special care needs the facility can provide. What type of therapy is available. Ask if these needs and therapy are handled by in-house staff or outside care. What are the qualifications of the individuals who provide these.
Before signing a contract for care at a specific facility you should fully review the contract and know your rights and responsibilities as the family and also those of your loved one as the resident. Review the admissions agreement carefully and have anything explained in detail that is not fully understood. Spend $150 or so to have an attorney review this for you if necessary. Do not sign any paperwork that has not been fully explained. The admissions contract should, at a minimum, contain the daily or monthly room and meals rate, any specific reasons for discharge or transfer from the facility (these items should apply to your family member if they do them or to anyone else in the facility if done to your loved one), and the policy regarding payment of the daily room rate if the resident goes to the hospital or the family brings the resident home for a short period of time. Is there a reduced or prorated rate or do you continue to pay full price to keep the room/space available?
You may question if you're really making the right decision to place your loved one in a facility at all. This is an agonizing decision that you will routinely question, but remember, you can do no more than your best. If you have done that, then you should not continue to ask more of yourself and know that you have done the best, as an Alzheimer's caregiver, for your family member.